Chick-Fil-A Here I Come...??

Restaurants I was pleased to learn are in Columbia, SoCa:
Pizzaria Uno
Jimmy John's
The Melting Pot
Fazoli's
Sonic

Restaurants Russ was pleased to learn are in Columbia, SoCa:
Chili's (whew!)

Restaurants that I will miss dearly:
P.F. Chang's
Trattoria No. 10
Bennigan's
The Cheesecake Factory
Biaggi's
Chipotle

Restaurants I am concerned about visiting in Columbia, SoCa:
John Paul's Armadillo Oil Company
Cat and Cleaver
Big T Bar-BQ Inc
Palmetto Pig
Goatfeathers

I am also happy to be able to shop at Kroger (I really wanted to say Kroger's) again. There is a Kroger that has a Chick-Fil-A inside. How super-duper is that? No really. . . is that a good thing?

If you're ever on Jeopardy: The Taste of Chicago is the world's largest free outdoor food festival (of course you have to pay to eat - mmm, alligator on a stick and hurricanes!) It attracts over 3.5 million people. Plus it has ab fab fireworks - a summer of love must!


- lada passes the mustard and biscuits. . . mmmm, hmmm

Stop Vocabulary Abuse

Common sayings (known only by hearsay rather than from print) that are used incorrectly so often that the incorrect pronunciation becomes more common than the correct:

correct / incorrect
intents and purposes / intensive purposes
couldn't care less / could care less
another think coming / another thing coming
exactly the same / exact same
buck naked / butt naked (this one at least makes sense)
deep-seated / deep-seeded
undoubtedly / undoubtably
en route / in route
midriff / midrift
in the midst / in the mist
every so often / ever so often
moot point / mute point

other common misuses
iterate (to repeat) / reiterate (to re-repeat...?)
orientated is not a word (oriented)
conversate is not a word (converse)
supposably (capable of being supposed) / supposedly (considered probable)
discreet (prudent) / discrete (separate)
moral (correct behavior) / morale (emotional condition)
exalt (hold in high regard) / exult (rejoice)
a factoid is not a true statement (humanoid - not human)
fiancé (male) / fiancée (female)
men are hanged / pictures are hung
inflammable means the same thing as flammable
you may have an itch or you may scratch an itch (please don't itch a tickle)
if someone is electrocuted - they died, otherwise they were just shocked

religious mix-ups
The immaculate conception was when Mary was conceived, not Jesus. The Son of God needed a pure vasal (neither vassel nor vessal) to carry him. So, Mary was "immaculately" conceived without original sin on her soul. Jesus being born of a virgin is known as the virgin birth.
cavalry (a la the army) / Calvary (hill where Jesus was crucified)
intercession (a prayer for someone) / intersession (between sessions)
The Ascension (Jesus goes to heaven - 40 days after Easter) / The Assumption (Mary goes to heaven - August 15)

a specific question
Karen - "while" is defined as:

1 : a period of time especially when short and marked by the occurrence of an action or a condition
2 : the time and effort used (as in the performance of an action)

Therefore, it seems "worth your while" is a perfectly fine thing to say. If you are still not comfortable using it, you could just use "worthwhile."

If you're ever on Jeopardy: PNEUMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANOCONIOSIS (45 letters; a lung disease caused by breathing in certain particles) is the longest word in any English-language dictionary.

- super-lada-fragi-listic-expi-ali-docious

"unbearable - yet unmissable"

I won't go see them.
I watched the trailer - to test myself. I think it lasted 60 seconds and the tears were streaming by the end. I cannot imagine an entire movie. To live every horrible moment as it happened in real-time. . . I don't want to. It was hard enough the first time.

or worse:

It will become a movie with Hollywood actors and fake explosions. I will eat popcorn and when the movie is over, I will leave the theater and return to the real world. . . I don't want to. It needs to stay real for me.

I know the families want the story to be remembered. I will not forget. I won't go see the movies because I am afraid of the pain. I will show my children.

United 93
World Trade Center
Against All Enemies
Time - put in my info under "magazine subscribers" to read the entire article

- lada

Crispy outside, juicy inside

My friend Dave (the co-worker, not the evil twin) and I were discussing lunch possibilities today:

Dave: I don't have enough money to get enough food for lunch. I'm really hungry.
lada: How can you not have enough money? You can get chicken nuggets for a dollar from Wendy's.
Dave: Yeah, but only five nuggets. I need like, fifty.
lada: You could not eat fifty nuggets
Dave: Piece of cake
lada: I'll take that bet. I'll pay the ten bucks for the nuggets, but if you can't finish or you puke, you owe me double.
Dave: It's ten bucks?
lada: Five nuggets for a dollar - so fifty nuggets cost ten. . .
Dave: Oh, yeah. Deal.

So he went to the Wendy's drive-through and picked up fifty nuggets, BBQ, sweet and sour, ranch, buffalo ranch, and honey mustard. The next 25 minutes went like this:

# 4 “mmmm, nuggets are good"
#16 "the ranch sauce is my favorite"
#22 "everything is really salty, even the sauces"
#34 "crap, I'm out of ranch"
#43 "uhh, these are getting disgusting"
#47 "the last three are going be really hard. . ."
#48 "I'm never eating chicken nuggets again"
#50 "I think I'm going to call in sick tomorrow with a heart attack”

Okay, so I lost the bet, but that kind of entertainment at work is priceless. Twenty minutes after wiping the crumbs off his chin he asked if I wanted to bet on who could eat the most Cold Stone ice cream. Now, I know I would have kicked his ass on that one (mmm, cake batter ice cream) but I passed. I assured him that just watching him eat crazy amounts of Wendy's all-white meat, cooked fresh to order chicken nuggets, (blug, blug) was enough to guarantee I wouldn't need to eat the rest of the day. Double blech - I looked it up:

2565 calories – 34.5 grams of saturated fat - 5900 mg of sodium

Who's laughing now Dave?

If you're ever on Jeopardy: Robert C. Baker, the Cornell University poultry science and food science professor who helped develop the chicken nugget, died (of a heart attack) March 13, 2006.

- lada steals from the rich and gives to the poor

Life is Beautiful*

Beautiful - Moby
Beautiful Freak - Eels
Beautiful - Smashing Pumpkins
At My Most Beautiful - R.E.M.
Beautiful Day - Len & Biz Markie
Beautiful - The Daybirds
The Beautiful Occupation - Travis
Beautiful - Christina Aguilera
Charlie Says (No One is Really Beautiful) - Jude
Beautiful Disaster - 311
You Are So Beautiful - Joe Cocker
Beautiful Stranger - Madonna
You And The Clouds Will Still Be Beautiful - XTC
Beautiful Day - U2
You're Beautiful - James Blunt
Beautiful - Snoop Dogg
Dream Girl (Beautiful Baby) - Dave Mathews Band
Beautiful Girl - INXS
Mr. E's Beautiful Blues - Eels
The Beautiful People - Marilyn Manson


* iPod playlist of the moment

The Listing:

Transferred owners hate to leave this barely lived in 2 year old home! 2nd floor ranch with too many upgrades to list! Canterbury Model offers open floor plan. Custom features include six panel pine doors, trim with nickel hardware. Upgraded lighting fixtures, carpeting and pad, ceramic tile flooring, & upgraded faucets, surround sound speaker wiring and vaulted ceilings. Kitchen features skylights, large center island, bevel edge counters, Kohler stainless steel sink, dual lever faucet w/sprayer, ceramic tile flooring, walk-in pantry, upgraded 42"cabinets, under cabinet lighting w/ switch, and upgraded appliances. Master Suite with private bath featuring ceramic tile, separate shower and soaking tub. The loft is ideal for computer or tech center or 3rd bedroom.


Townhome, County: KANE, Year Built: 2004
School district #: 300
6 rooms
Total: 1,859 square feet
Master bedroom is 18X14
Living room is 24X19
Dining room is 12X12
Kitchen is 12X15
2 car garage
Central air conditioning
Interior features: Cathedral/vaulted ceilings, Laundry in units, Skylights
Exterior features: Deck
Parking type: Off street
Exterior: Siding (AVS) and Brick (BR)


List price: $257,900
Home owners' assessments: $124
Frequency: monthly
Taxes: $1,652
Market time: 7

my home is now a house. . . sigh. . . lada

My new toy....

click on this link and it will mark where you are shouting from

I heart the summer of love

Our first Cubs game of the season - beer, peanuts and brats, oh my! The Reds won. (Oh, and they do sell forties in Chicago. See, I can admit when I am wrong.)

Brittney has brought all sorts of Raytown connections with her - scary. We met up with Matt last night. Matt and I got married in seventh grade. Our teacher paired up everyone in the class so we could Punnett square our hair and eye color to see what our children would look like. I seem to remember that getting "married" and discussing babies in sex-ed is embarrassing when you are twelve. But he was a good first husband - he didn't beat me or anything.

South Carolina has the country's highest high school drop out rate. (Joh-jah is a close second.) That's all I have to say about that.

I'm going shoe shopping today! Sweet. I'm pretty sure I feel about shoes the way straight guys feel about women's breasts. Wee!

Quote of the day - Karen: I had a little bit of a heart attack in my mouth.

- lada (a.k.a. laro)

Needs

Here's how it works - Google "(your name) needs" and see what comes up. Here are some of yours that I found oddly relevant - or at least amusing:

Brittney needs to put some clothes on in the first place

Uncle Russ needs YOU! (insert picture of Russ with top hat, pointing forcefully)

Where ever DiAnne needs to go I am there to drive her, whether it be to doctor, specialist, physiotherapist, hairdresser, dentist or friends. . .

Anonymous needs a project with peppers (who doesn't need more pepper projects in life?)

Nick needs some help with changing his kid

Faith needs doubt like children need love

Heather Needs Men . . .Now! (ohmygod, that is scary accurate! )

Tim needs your help. Will sell wife for food

(and my very, very, very favorite) Karen needs a Lobotomy Fund

- again, the lada needs a rest

Peter Pan Syndrome

In direct contrast to my five things that make me an adult - here is some evidence I am still a dumb kid:

1) Brittney gave me a Barbie. I started to play with her today. I brushed her hair and put on her shoes and then decided it is a lot more fun to play Barbie with a sister/friend/daughter (gasp! stamping down maternal instinct...stamp! And stay down!) Oh all right - fine, maybe a daughter. Kare-bear has become way more interested in real boys then the plastic kind anyway. Maybe that is the point of having children - an excuse to play with their toys (while you make them do the dishes).

2) For some really random reason our home office sent us slinkies. I don’t really get the whole marketing strategy behind that one, but it doesn’t matter much because, goodness my work days are busy now: building obstacle courses for the slinky to navigate, juggling slinkies (read: dropping slinkies), making slinky bracelets, making slinky sling-shots . . . you get the point. Oh, and this is what a slinky looks like: (((((((((((((( )

3) Hello, my name is lada and I play video games. (blushing) In fact, I might need an Xbox 360 because this new game Oblivion looks bad ass.

4) I have always had a soft spot for Fantasia. And now, at the ripe old age of 25, I have the answer to a question that has plagued me for almost 20 years. It has been discussed and argued and investigated, and just when I had accepted that there was no answer, I have it - right in front of me. That's right kiddies, the Childlike Empress from The Neverending Story has a name.



(Scene)
Childlike Empress: Bastian! Call my name!
Bastian: I can't! I have to keep my feet on the ground!
C.E.: Bastian, PLEASE! Save us! (Fantasia crumbling around her)
Bastian: All right! I'll do it! I'll save you!

Then he bellows her new name out a window into a raging thunderstorm and saves the world. But the only thing we the viewers can make out over the wind/rain/thunder is, "Ma-wah-blah." Huh? What's the name?
I actually bought the DVD a couple years ago and watched it with the subtitles on hoping for an answer. No such luck. Fine, I thought, perhaps she doesn't have a real name. That would allow the ten year olds of the world to create their own names, you know, use their imaginations and stuff. Wrong. My sweet coz bought me the book (how did I miss the book?) and I am reading it and now I KNOW HER NAME. It is not, as we assumed, his mother's name - unless his mother was a total hippie. You want to know it, don't you? Well, perhaps you don't, but those patient readers who have known me for the past 20 years will at least be relieved that we don't have to talk about it anymore. If you want to maintain your own childlike innocence (or if you are really bored with this topic), stop reading here. Ready...

"...Only he, Bastian, could do anything about it. And he would have to do something, or else he too would be included in the circle. It seemed to him that this story had been repeated a thousand time, as though there were no before and after and everything had happened at once...Bastian was unaware of the tears that were running down his cheeks. Close to fainting, he suddenly cried out: "Moon Child, I'm coming!" In that moment several things happened at once..."

There you have it. Moon Child. I had to let it sink in . . . Hmmm . . . Moon Child, huh? Hmmm . . ."This is my son Battle and my daughter Moon Child." Has a ring to it, no?

If you're ever on Jeopardy - The names of the three monkeys are Mizaru (see no evil), Kikazaru (hear no evil), and Iwazaru (speak no evil).

- lada never puts off until tomorrow what she can do the day after

grotesquely melodramatic:

I’m having one of those nights; one of those nights I used to have when I was 18 - when everything in the world just seems so freaking powerful/emotional. It is a combination of things:

1) The music I am putting on my iPod that I haven’t listened to in way too long. There is so much old sentiment behind it (Athenaeum).
2) Reading another blog that reminds me of my life five years ago. The city of Chicago can seriously change a person.*
3) An hour long conversation with my best friend from high school whom I haven’t talked to in ages.
4) Alcohol**

I am feeling massive emotions . . . I had to take a break from typing and go sit outside and breathe some fresh air - no stars out though. One thing I will not miss about Chi-town is the lack of stars. I love (unabashed blugging) my new my GPS; but I guarantee I will turn it off at some point in South Carolina so I can find my way home by Orion. I miss the late nights (early mornings) when we did the “let’s see where this road takes us - get lost and see if we can find our way home.” In particular, I loved the night of Grocery Road in Columbia, MO. It was such a great road. I actually went back to find it again a few days later and it was gone - never could find Grocery Road again. It is a fab name for a road though, Grocery. Another name I saw from the back of my Aunt's Harley in Florida: Sea Grape. I would like to retire some day on a road called Sea Grape. Much better than the lane I am on now that people confuse with my own name, and everyone always spells wrong. . .

The iPod is lovely. I recognize I am late on this bus; however, it is beautifully new to me. It's like a blankie I was missing that is now always by my side to comfort me - any song for the soundtrack to my life, ready at any given moment. Best music ever at the touch of a button. Is it possible I lived a full life without all my precious music there with me? (see, I said it was melodramatic.) The times that would have been enhanced if only I had THAT song available right THEN.

If you're ever on Jeopardy - A group of eels is called a swarm. A group of unicorns is called a blessing.

- lada shot the sheriff, but she did not shoot the deputy

* Glorious - drinking a gimlet, reading someone’s innermost thoughts that they wrote long before they ever knew you or knew you would read their blog. I feel a bit voyeuristic. (yet it makes you love someone because it is so personal at times. . . )

** My day: Fuck you Realtor – you called me “girl” – you said my upgrades were “too much money” – screw your platinum Remax status – I hate the smell of Ajax on my hands because I scrubbed and disinfected the entire house so you couldn’t take pictures because you forget your camera - fuck your 5% commission – screw the apples, lemons, oranges and limes I put into a bowl as a centerpiece so the dinning room would look appealing; I’m making a delicious organic gimlet out of those very limes right now.*** Yes, I need to discuss it with my husband, and no, we will not be calling you back to sign a contract. Piss off. I'm calling the second choice, Karen G___.

*** Two parts vodka – one part seltzer – one lime, squeezed to death – sprinkle of sugar (not your traditional gimlet, but crazy good anyway)

Not Really Lent Oriented

Disclaimer: These lyrics don't necessarily apply to me, but I like this song for the lyric's sake. (Schmidt, you're better off just not reading this one. . . )

Dear God,
Hope you got the letter, and
I pray you can make it better down here.
I don't mean a big reduction in the price of beer,
But all the people that you made in your image,
See them starving on their feet,
'cause they don't get enough to eat. . . from God,
I can't believe in you.

Dear god,
Sorry to disturb you, but
I feel, that I should be heard loud and clear.
We all need a big reduction in the amount of tears,
And all the people that you made in your image,
See them fighting in the street,
'cause they can't make opinions meet. . . about God,
I can't believe in you.

Did you make disease, and the diamond blue?
Did you make mankind after we made you?
(And the devil too!)

Dear God,
Don't know if you noticed, but
Your name is on a lot of quotes in this book.
Us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look,
And all the people that you made in your image,
Still believing that junk is true.
Well I know it ain't and so do you. . . dear God,
I can't believe in,
I don't believe in,
I won't believe in. . . heaven and hell.
No saints, no sinners, (no devil as well).
No pearly gates, no thorny crown.
You're always letting us humans down.
The wars you bring, the babes you drown.
Those lost at sea and never found,
And it's the same the whole world 'round.
The hurt I see helps to compound,
That the Father, Son and Holy Ghost,
Is just somebody's unholy hoax,
And if you're up there you'll perceive,
That my heart's here upon my sleeve.
If there's one thing I don't believe in. . .
It's you,
Dear God.

XTC - Dear God - Uppsy Daisy Assortment

Free Association: I

I prefer black ink over blue, blue skies over grey, grey to gray, Dorian Grey over Earl Grey, my Uncle Earl to the Duke of Earl, but never Duke over North Carolina. Go Tar Heels! Heels over loafers, loafing over working, working over the poorhouse, houses overlooking the lake are best. Lake Michigan beats the Great Salt Lake, salt is better than ice, ice cream over asparagus, ass is always better than being hard-up, the Up album beats Automatic for the People, automatics are not as fun to drive as sticks, sticks may break bones, but names will never hurt me, hurting is way better than dying, in fact, to dye also beats to die, diets are lame, but are better than being fat, though fat can have advantages in the freezing cold. Colds are better than scarlet fever, scarlet letters don't compare to red letter days, nor are days as alluring as nights, knights that say "Ni!" always beat knights in white satin, satin beats Satan - Satan is about as low as you can go.

I also like college lined paper much better than wide rule. But that's a whole other story. . .

- lada only hears what she wants to

'95-'99

Movies I loved in in high school that I still like now:

A Life Less Ordinary
Mallrats
Empire Records
Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
Clueless
Rushmore
SLC Punk
Trainspotting

10 points to anyone who gives me quotes (other than "Chill, Winston")

- lada loves chocolate covered pretzels

lada land Public Access

Russ has something he would like to say and wishes to reach a massive audience when he says it. This blog does not reach a massive audience; however, I deemed this less embarrassing than shouting from the rooftops. I hope our neighbors appreciate my sacrifice. Here he goes:

I love GPS. Without it, I was lost - but now I am found. Everyone
should get GPS. You can use it to map directions to the store so you
can buy a Dyson. Thank you.

This message has been brought to you by lada land. This was only a test. In the event that Russ actually takes over lada land permanently, you will know that I have been tortured and probably killed. Avenge me readers. Avenge me.

If you're ever on Jeopardy - The international telephone dialing code for Antarctica is 672.

- lada

Go Big or Go Home

Birthday consisted of a bottle of champagne at the Signature Room on the 96th floor of the Hancock followed by dancing with friends. Any night is better with tiaras and sponge animals (You know the capsules you put in the tub as a kid? Yup, you can do them in your mouth. They work faster with warm liquid though, so maybe mulled wine. I had a turkey - Karen had a duck - Evan had a platypus...or something with a tail...?) And of course, we noshed on the best carrot cake ever.

Discrete nod to Dr. Sanders (a.k.a. Gabriel) who did us a solid. Thanks.

Eight legged freaks
What is an arachnophobe to do when a spider is on the wall and no one else is home to smash it for her? I can't even get close enough to one to kill it (you never know, it might be the jumping kind) especially with something as flimsy as a tissue - paper is a useless shield against fangs. This leaves:

- Go into denial that the spider even exists and hope it just goes away.

Downside - when it does go away one must wonder where exactly it went.

- Throw a shoe at it.

Downside - explaining shoe prints on the wall to a grumpy husband

Karen found a solution! Possibly the greatest invention ever (Other than the iPod, of which I am a proud new owner - 7,500 songs, oh my!)

It has a long handle so you don't have to get anywhere near the cursed creature, then you pull the trigger and it tangles the legs all up so it can't get away while you race to the bathroom to send it to a watery grave! Of course, I have yet to test it on an actual spider, but it worked damn well on a balled up piece of purple Easter grass. I cannot say I am eager, but I am at least anticipating my next arachnid run-in. Bring it on mofo.


No legged freaks
I have lived in this city for five years and just now discovered the northern suburbs have what can only be described as a major worm situation. It rained while we were hanging out* at the parents' house, which in a normal neighborhood means you get a couple little worms chilling on the sidewalk, right? No such luck in this crazy town. These worms come out in full force like they are staging a take over. The driveways were all covered, and these suckers are massive! I shit you not, some of them were a foot long (think Indiana Jones in the snake pit), and they were everywhere. Which meant, to get to the car, I had to tip-toe in flip-flops around them while they writhed and wriggled (rather unpleasant), and poor Karen, in heels, couldn't help but impale the mega-worms with her stilettos (squish, "ewww," squish, "ewww"). Not a damn bird in sight.


If you're ever on Jeopardy - The housefly hums in the middle octave, key of F.

- lada keeps on truckin'

*Can I tell you how rowdy four twenty-somethings (well, Karen's practically thirty) can get when they are hunting for Easter eggs that are filled with quarters. Inhibitions were tossed to the wind. Russ came out with ten bucks; Brittney lost, but we love her anyway. My parents are freaking awesome.