Come On Feel the Illinoise!

Life was demanding a road trip
I needed to sort some things out in my head and there is nothing like watching the sunrise over the mountains in Tennessee to put life in perspective. (And there is nothing like driving the length of Indiana to make you appreciate why Boeing is in business.) It started to snow at exactly the moment I crossed the Illinois state line. They were big fat, juicy flakes and they were perfect. It is good to be back in Chicago. I love this town.

A necessary bit of gratitude
"First Husband" Matt:
Here's to the man who, despite an abundance of alcoholic beverages, can gracefully spin and dip his tipsy dance partner whilst simultaneously making reliable literary recommendations (that you know to write down for me the next morning because I would never remember the titles on my own).
Thank you for the hours at the book store today and the Bloody Mary. Thank you for giving my lungs advice (keep breathing, don't smoke). Thank you for the emails that are purely stream of consciousness. Thanks for fifteen years of argument-free marriage. Thanks for the hugs/laughs. My heart is happy to have you as a friend.

You know you are in my family if you randomly used any of these phrases in the past two days:
Brilliantly brutal
Calendrically congruent
The trickle down effect of psychosis
Goddamn Eddie Vedder
The proper level of terror must be maintained

101 Things to do (or don't) before you die - #31:
Do experience weightlessness.
Don't put too much faith in polls.

- lada will bring home the turkey if you bring home the bacon

The Typewriter Contract

It would seem my word alone is not sufficient. I told him to write me a contract, so he did:

Due to extenuating circumstances I, lada, hereinafter referred to as "Thistle," have allowed myself an extended Lost Weekend. Said weekend has involved partaking in nicotine in the form of cigarette smoke drawn into my lungs. I recognize that this has been a temporary aid during these times and I have no plans to further this practice beyond this Lost Weekend or to engage in it on a daily basis in the immediate or long-term future.

I, Thistle, hereby swear to end this habit on the instant I leave Massachusetts soil and return home. At that specific time, any and all cigarettes, cigars, pipes, chewing tobacco, etc. will be completely used and/or smoked. If any of said cigarettes remain, they must be immediately destroyed, gifted, or otherwise discarded. I also promise to avoid this habit in the future, no matter how much I may want a drag to alleviate any stress or bad days that may arise on my return to ordinary life. I sign this in full cognizance of my senses and faculties and in the witness of my dear cousin and friend. May God Almighty have mercy on my wretched soul if I break this contract.

Witness:
T.J.L.J.

Signee:
L.E.T.G.D.

101 Things to do (or don't) before you die - #30:
Do stay in the best suite in a five star hotel.
Don't assemble absurdly difficult jigsaw puzzles.

- lada is going quietly mad

An Ode to H. P. Lovecraft

Tim and I took a day trip to see some cemeteries today (why yes, we are a bit odd). On the way back, we stopped at a random hole in the wall in Rhode Island called The Ivy Pub. I must have been feeling all sorts of festive because I had a generous helping of rye bread, red meat, and Guinness.
On the way out we noticed a sign on the wall:

Cheers!

- lada is Providence

For a Taste of Your Whiskey, I'll Give You Some Advice

I stopped at a gas station in Charlotte this morning on my way to the airport and I had "The Gambler" by Kenny Rogers playing (a bit too loudly so I could still hear it with my car door open while I stood there pumping my gas). As I was absentmindedly singing along watching the dollar total spin up and up, I noticed the two guys on either side of me were also singing along with my Kenny. On my right was a skinny, young white kid filling up his truck loaded with landscaping equipment; on my left was a big, old black guy driving a rusted-out brown pinto. We caught each others' eyes and sort of smiled/laughed at the silliness of our impromptu karaoke - and then the three of us brazenly belted out the chorus together at the top of our lungs.

That really made my day.

- lada knows when to hold ‘em, knows when to fold ‘em, knows when to walk away, and knows when to run

Summer of Love Redux

I needed to write this stuff down. Partly because they make me happy to think about and also, so I can start keeping track of the dates:

3/14
Boston for another round of Saint Patrick’s Day with Tim and Karen. I heart pipes and drums.

3/28
Chicago for the Cubs’ opening day! Ahhh, baseball = bliss.
Oh, and also to see my parents, sister, first-husband Matt, and brother Quique.

5/8
Atlanta to see Radiohead for the first time in six years with sweet Sam. Maybe Thom and I can catch up on old times...

5/9
Charlotte for a second night of Thom and the boys, this time with some friends from SoCa.

7/12
Cincinnati for the Michelle/Allen wedding. And Skyline.

8/6
Tennessee for the reunion that is going to be ridiculously awesome.

8/13
Atlanta for the Cubs vs. Braves three-game series.


Good Doctor: Let me know what weekends you can get off sooner rather than later so I can pen you into my schedule. I am desperately craving Dallas sushi, a good shiraz and your face.

Gogo: Florida? Baby Shower? Golf cart ride at midnight?

101 Things to do (or don't) before you die - #29:
Do meet your idol.
Don't take a budget bus tour of Europe.

- lada takes just like a women, aches just like a women, but she breaks just like a little girl

A Random Email

To: lada
From: Matt R.
Subject: Funny Story

So I'm at Walgreen’s and I see two items on sale this week in the check out lane:

1. A one-step pregnancy test: The problem was "test" was in really small letters and I didn't see the word at first. I was utterly baffled by the merchandising of a “one-step pregnancy” selling for $9.99. I laughed at myself (nearly audibly) for my confusion.

2. A personal massager: Located right next to that pre-filled, auto injecting sperm launcher, was this beauty of a sale item. It could be a back massager but it was small and it was waterproof. What's small, vibrates and needs to be underwater? Apparently, not all women have kick-ass shower heads.*

Matt

101 Things to do (or don't) before you die - #28:
Do skydive.
Don't be intimidated by obstacles.

- lada’s crazy is catching

*The 101 things to do and don't come out of a couple of books, not my head. I point this out because sometimes they have an odd way of relating to whatever is happening in my life. For instance: I receive this email from Matt, decide to post it for your entertainment, and as I am flipping through the book to type up #28, I catch a glimpse #27. Nice.